Adventures from Bear Hunting to Tatting Lace.

‘I hope he dies in a room full of people and no one cares’

—Joffrey’s Wedding—

“Holla!”

theholytwin:

ceilingtheo:

shutupanddiehl:

blingostarr:

buttsexington:

America: Do whatever the fuck you want because America

#or just throw it all into the harbor

Does anyone actually follow that ettiquette in England?

Because my understanding of tea ettiquette in England is: OFFER YOUR GUEST TEA AS SOON AS THEY ARRIVE - GIVE THEM THE LARGER MUG, BECAUSE THEN THEY CAN HAVE MORE TEA IN IT, AND MORE TEA IS BETTER - OFFER THEM MORE TEA AS SOON AS THEY HAVE FINISHED THEIR MUG OF TEA, BECAUSE MORE TEA IS BETTER.

IF SOMEONE LOOKS STRESSED, OFFER TO MAKE THEM TEA. IF SOMEONE LOOKS UPSET, OFFER TO MAKE THEM TEA. IF SOMEONE LOOKS TIRED, OFFER TO MAKE THEM TEA. IF SOMEONE HAS JUST COME IN FROM THE RAIN, OFFER TO MAKE THEM TEA. IF SOMEONE HAS JUST RECEIVED BAD NEWS, OFFER TO MAKE THEM TEA. IF YOU ARE WATCHING TV WITH SOMEONE AND THERE IS AN ADBREAK, OFFER TO MAKE THEM TEA. IF YOU ARE MAKING YOURSELF TEA, OFFER TO MAKE EVERYONE ELSE TEA. IF SOMEONE IS NOT CURRENTLY HOLDING A MUG OF TEA, DOUBLE CHECK THAT THAT IS AN INTENTIONAL STATE OF AFFAIRS, AND THEY DO NOT, IN FACT, WANT A CUP OF TEA.

TEA.

OR JUST THROW IT ALL IN THE HARBOR

(via theyoungarchaeologist)

hossjaeger:

Yisssss

pocky-box:

I CAN’T STOP LAUGHING. Reddit seriously has the best ideas. 

Originally entitled, “The War of Five Kings”, but the last 4 were added to the original post.

(via weighedandmeasured)

“HONEY”

“WHAT”

“WHERE’S MY SPEECH NOTES”

“WHAT”

“WHERE. ARE. MY. SPEECH. NOTES.”

“I UHHHH. ORGANISED THEM.”

“WHAT?!”

“WHY DO YOU NEED TO KNOW.”

“I NEED THEM”

“UH UH DON’T YOU THINK ABOUT PRACTISING THAT SPEECH TONIGHT I’VE BEEN PLANNING THIS DINNER FOR MONTHS”

“BUT AMERICA IS IN NEED”

“MY STOMACH IS IN NEED OF THAT FANCY DINNER.”

“YOU TELL ME WHERE MY SPEECH IS WOMAN THIS IS FOR INTERNATIONAL JUSTICE”

“I’M MICHELLE OBAMA. I INVENTED JUSTICE.”

(via laughcentre)

evrel:

blametaryn:

thebergeronprocess:

trevorlewis:

tannanana:

postmodernismruinedme:

f33ny:

canada: where hot politicians take off their shirts and box for charity

Justin Trudeau also did a strip tease for charity.

FUCK YEAH, CANADA.

Hello, new home

CAN THIS HAPPEN IN AMERICA

I love my country omg

moving to Canada

• When something bad happens: True is it that we have seen better days.
• When something REALLY bad happens: O woe! O woeful, woeful, woeful day! Most lamentable day. Most woeful day That ever, ever I did yet behold! O day, O day, O day! O hateful day! Never was seen so black a day as this.O woeful day! O woeful day!
• When people say that something is wrong because the Bible says so: The Devil can cite scripture for his purpose.
• When my girlfriend abandons me for food: FRAILTY, THY NAME IS WOMAN!
• When someone doesn't thank me for holding the door open for them: BLOW, BLOW, BLOW, THOU WINTER WIND! THOU ART NOT SO UNKIND AS MAN'S INGRATITUDE!
• When I burn something while cooking: MY CAKE IS DOUGH!
• When human stupidity frustrates me: LORD, WHAT FOOLS THESE MORTALS BE!
• When someone says I'm going to hell for my sins: NYMPH, IN THY ORISONS BE ALL MY SINS REMEMBER'D.
• When I'm broke: My pride fell with my fortunes
• When someone turns the light on after a period of darkness and blinding light ensues: OH, SHE DOTH TEACH THE TORCHES TO BURN BRIGHT!
• When someone disagrees with me: THERE ARE MORE THINGS IN HEAVEN AND EARTH, HORATIO, THEN ARE DREAMT OF IN YOUR PHILOSOPHY.
• When I argue with my girlfriend: The course of true love never did run smooth.
• When I'm embarrassed: MUST I HOLD A CANDLE TO MY SHAMES?!
• Someone says "Good Night": Good Night, Good night! Parting is such sweet sorrow, that I shall say good night till it be morrow.

deathtosquishies:

OH GOD THE NIGEL STAMPEDE

(via oneira-taxia)

effyeahchampomix:

I mean, 

• Hufflepuff. HUFF le PUFF.
• They’re mostly considered nice and peaceful.
• They live right by the kitchen.
• Their head of house teaches herbology.
• “Badger” is exactly the kind of animal a stoner would come up with.
• Slytherins obviously do cocaine.

#THIS IS A LEGITIMATE THEORY#YOU KNOW CEDRIC DIGGORY WAS HIGH MOST OF THE TIME#I MEAN YOU HAD TO HAVE BEEN HIGH TO THINK OPENING THE EGG IN A BATH WAS A LEGIT IDEA

(via laughcentre)

Source: missybees